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Failure is something we fear in our everyday. We think negatively and we think that sometimes we would fail too. The word failure literally means feelings of disappointment, inadequacy, and frustration. Failure can be seen as a misstep or an essential part of growth because everybody fails at one point in time. Instead of always looking back on the past and seeing failure as a failure, I saw the time I failed as a valuable opportunity for learning, growth, and resilience. The year before I went to graduate school in Washington DC, I decided to teach English abroad. I wanted to teach English in one of my favorite places, Israel. I went there and enjoyed the food, the people, and most importantly the children I taught. The children I taught also saw themselves as a failure. They were below their reading level, and some couldn’t write their name in English. But they spoke other languages such as Russian, Spanish, Hebrew, etc. Even though I enjoyed the children I taught, I was told that I was asked to leave the program halfway through it because I wasn’t the right fit. I was devasted and I too felt like a failure. As I was trying to contemplate why I too was asked to leave a job I loved wasn’t because I was inadequate, instead, I learned that I had these debilitating migraines because of stress. I was stressed out by living in a small space with two very difficult roommates but by the end we did get along. I was frustrated by not feeling apart of the group but I knew I had to leave to take care of myself. I was frustrated about living in a foreign country and didn’t understand their healthcare system. In the end, I decided to leave to deal with my migraines and my mental health. I decided to invest in some self-care. In turn, I saw this not as a failure but as a sign of maturity that I too learned that I did not fail but I succeeded at taking care of myself and seeing myself in a step of growth. Throughout this whole experience, I learned so much about myself. I learned that I can find myself around a crazy bus system, find friends in a country I love, and find hope within myself to keep going and to keep taking care of myself despite the challenges.
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